The latest wonder drug to hit the market: Beano. It’s a pill you take before eating gassy foods to prevent unpleasant emissions from the nether regions. However for a topic so ripe with potential, the best they came up with was “Enjoy food without gas.” It’s a pity considering all the possibilities available to them.

I wonder what it was like to be a test subject for Beano. How did they measure the tootiness level after eating beans or other musical fruit. At least it would make for an interesting conversation when someone asked what you did for a living.

There are an impressive number of farting sites on the web, as well as an informative collection of farting facts for more somber-minded individuals.


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  1. This might have helped the whale from Monday.

    Can you imagine being the child of one of the, um, measurers? “My Dad measures farts for Beano.”

    Comment by Jan on August 20, 2003 @ 5:27 am
  2. Latest wonder drug? This stuff has been around for years. I’m sure our wonderful pharmaceutical companies have developed some new amazing concoction since then.

    You know, they ought to mix that stuff into the food at the MTC. I’d never experienced so much farting in my life before that….

    Comment by Levi on August 20, 2003 @ 9:13 am
  3. Hey, thanks for the link to fart thesaurus. Awesome find.

    I’ve enjoyed getting to know you through your blog, and am still laughing out loud at your excessive-exclamation-mark article.

    I hate overuse of those, too! ooops. I meant to do that. (Now I’m paranoid).

    Hope it’s okay that I’m adding you to my reads.

    Comment by Kristine on August 20, 2003 @ 9:29 am
  4. Levi: I know, I know. I was bein’ sarcastic.

    Kristine: You were laughing in a good way, right? As in, “Ha ha ha, that’s so true. Funny and true.” Thanks for adding me to your list of reads, it’s fine by me.

    Comment by dan on August 20, 2003 @ 9:44 am
  5. Oh by the way I found another example of excessive use of exclamation marks. The mother trying to find a husband for her daughter used used lots of exclamation marks in the letter she wrote.

    Comment by dan on August 20, 2003 @ 9:48 am
  6. There seems to be a flatulence theme with this blog. Perhaps you should rename your blog: “Fartrogen dioxide: the truth behind your hershey splerts.”

    The problem with Beano is that it’s really only good at solving the fart problem that comes from eating foods that cause additional gas (beans). It doesn’t solve the normal everyday gas that we all enjoy so much.

    Did you know that the average person farts around 10 times a day?

    Comment by Anonymous on August 20, 2003 @ 10:12 am
  7. I was afraid people might get that impression, but two entries about flatulence is mere coincidence, not a theme.

    I have never kept track of how often I toot, but 10 seems quite high. Averages can be misleading. For instance, if 9 people toot once a day and 1 person toots 91 times a day, the average is 10, even though no one tooted 10 times a day.

    Comment by dan on August 20, 2003 @ 11:50 am
  8. LOL good example of another dizzying display of exclamation points.


    Must figure out how to relax my eyebrows now.

    Comment by Kristine on August 21, 2003 @ 8:26 am
  9. please may i have a free sample to test? as i get very gassy from time to time. please send to :
    66 Margeruite Way
    Bishops Stortford

    i would greatly appreciate this. thank you very much


    Miss V.Essien

    Comment by Miss Victoria Essien on October 31, 2003 @ 7:52 am
  10. You’d have to contact them to get a sample.

    Comment by dan on October 31, 2003 @ 9:22 am

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